My parent’s generation had a lot of challenges as they came of age on the heels of the Great Depression only to face the trauma of a world war followed soon by the Korean War. My generation experienced the Vietnam War and its related civil upheaval, and generations since have been marked by 9/11, and wars in Iraq and Afghanistan. More recently COVID brought havoc and suffering across all generational divides. Generation after generation has been characterized by the conflicts and hard times each has endured. History focuses on the crucibles – the white-hot moments of the past that have seared away fluff and pretense to expose humanity, often as a petulant child with wants and needs of the moment. Our historical obsession with the spasms of humanity fails to recognize our potential. Good is overshadowed by failures. We are indeed obsessed with things-gone-wrong, but what of the good?

History points to individuals who exhibit courage and resolve under difficult circumstances. We refer to them as heroes. They are defined by the conflicts that embroiled them, the barriers they’ve overcome, the great battles that were fought, and the great sacrifices that were made. Yet, selfless acts of a hero do not require greatness. These acts have a common genesis – caring, for a buddy in a foxhole, a child in a burning building, or a homeless senior on a winter’s night.

Human beings have a capacity for empathy – a caring concern for others. We extend ourselves for the well being of family members, friends, and yes, strangers. Amid conflict this caring concern leads to acts of heroism which history extolls. But such caring occurs every day in every society on Earth. Neighbors look after one another, frightened children are comforted, hungry families are fed, and at-risk people are protected. Although we rightly regard how imperfectly our individual and civil empathy is manifested, I look to its existence as a hopeful aspect of our human character.

Not all species on Earth exhibit empathy in a manner we understand as such, but many do. This is particularly evident for mothers who nurse, instruct, and protect their young to the point of exhaustion or death. The special nature of empathy expressed by our species is that it is a willful act. We are free to do otherwise, but often choose selflessness. For us, empathy is a choice.

Empathy we express can be narrowly applied to members of family or clan or can be expansive to include others unlike ourselves. We choose the scope of our caring.

In past eras of conflict and tension that historians have taken note of, societies have turned inward and the expanse of caring, one for another, withered. Yet that aspect of our humanness, which we know to be true, can never be untrue again. We have the capacity for empathy and caring if we choose to make use of it. Like all such freedoms, caring is a choice.

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Kevin Deeny